I’m So Sorry, and I Hear You

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Right now the news is full of stories about sexual abuse/assault/harassment in Hollywood.

It’s everywhere. Actors, actresses, politicians, and anyone who has ever been anywhere near Hollywood are all being called out – some by name – and asked to comment on this.

And they are. Or they aren’t. And it feeds the news cycle. Story after story, headline after headline, on and on it goes.

And as more people speak out, an all too familiar pattern has emerged:

  • Sure the guy was wrong, but why didn’t she say something sooner?
  • What’s the big deal? He asked ten times, and she said no ten times, and so he listened. Finally.
  • What is she looking for with this? She’s probably in it for money.
  • She’s rich and famous, why should she complain?
  • That’s just the way is there in Hollywood.
  • This happened 20 years ago, they just need to get over it.
  • She’s known to sleep around, so it’s not that big of a deal.
  • And on, and on, and on.

And it makes me sick. Absolutely sick.

And what I want to say to anyone who has ever been a victim of abuse is that I am so sorry, and I hear you.

I know. I know that you see these famous actresses, beautiful and seemingly flawless, and you hear people doubting them, belittling them, and ignoring their claims. And I know that it makes you think that if no one listens to them, then who would listen to you.

And I’m so sorry. And I hear you.

I know that when you hear the audio of someone in power trying to coerce someone, you are flooded with terrible memories.

And I’m so sorry. And I hear you.

I know that when you hear victims talking about feeling ashamed, guilty, and even complicit in their abuse, you hang your head a bit, having struggled – or still struggling – with the very same things.

And I’m so sorry. And I hear you.

Friends, the issues in Hollywood are real. The pain is real. The victims are real. And I pray for everyone who has been hurt, that they can find the help that they need in order to heal.

I pray that eyes are opened and that a system that is so deeply flawed and damaging can be completely overhauled.

But now I need to look around me, on a more local scale. And I ask you to do the same. Find ways to help victims of abuse. Learn to look for warning signs.

Learn to listen.

Watch your responses to public victims of abuse, because you never know who around you may also be a victim. The statistics are staggering, and sickening.

We can’t do nothing. We have to do something.

Every single one of us.

So listen.


And repeat after me: I am so sorry, and I hear you.

See you soon.







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